Of course I’m kidding. Old people rule. But I’m serioulsy never offering up my seat on the bus ever again. Tonight on the way home the bus filled up fairly quickly. I’m looking around and there are no pregnant people, just yuppy boys and girls typing away on their Blackberries or reading an Oprah Book Club selection (don’t get me started). Then a older gentlemen got on the bus and was standing. Now for the longest time I didn’t offer him my seat (should’ve kept to my original plan), but he kind of looked around as the bus started to pull away, like he was looking for a seat, so I pulled out my earplugs halfway and tapped him and said softly “Would you like to sit.” A nice gesture I thought. Now the guy wasn’t ancient and was dressed fairly preppy, so I figured he’d probably decline. No harm, no foul. I was also thinking that he looked about my Dad’s age, and I’d like someone to offer him a seat if he was standing.

Well either I caught this guy on a bad day, or he’s just bitter, useless, piece-of-shit, but he responded with a “Why. Do I look too old.” And mumbled something else. I was kind of shocked, so I just smiled and said, “Just thought I’d offer” and put my music back on. He said something else that I couldn’t make out so I just smiled. A girl a few rows back gave me the “Oh well shrug” – and thank god for that because I was fucking pissed. I almost wanted to yell as he got off the bus later, “Careful getting off the bus, don’t break your fucking hip,” but I didn’t.

WTF. I tried to be nice, and now I’m all fucked in the head because old dude was a dick.

This is officially the last time I offer up my seat to anyone who doesn’t have a noticeable fetus growing inside of them. And those better start smiling and saying thanks, or they’re up shit creek too.

Fucking breeders.